Notes To My Younger Self

Remember that Twilight Zone episode where the pretty young girl is being chased by an older woman in black on horseback? At the end of the episode, you realize it is the older version of the same pretty girl trying to catching up with her younger self and advise her. Very cool episode.

While I have no regrets, I often think of the 25 year old girl I was once was and all my worries, concerns and uneasiness. While walking the other day, I thought, if I could go back and talk to/advise my younger self, what would I tell her? Here goes:

-Don’t ever try to fit in and don’t worry about being different. It’s OK to be different. One day you will love your red hair, being tall, your crazy sense of humor, your uniqueness and your pale white skin.  Like who you are just as you are. Different is good.

-Stay completely out of the sun and apply sunscreen liberally. Robyn, you will

never tan. You are physically incapable of tanning. You are a redhead and do not possess melanin. Hello? Twenty years from now, when you have few wrinkles and look younger than you are, you will appreciate this greatly. So, be patient!! It’s so worth being so pale when you are young.

-Recognize a jerk long before he outgrows you. Don’t spend too much time with him and do not shed too many tears. You will be with many jerks before you realize that. Realize your worth and value much earlier than you did.

-Don’t be so modest and flaunt it. Your body will be in its most perfect form at your age; stop being so self-conscious. Have more confidence in yourself.

-Trust your first impression of someone. It is always correct. As Maya Angelou says, "The first time someone shows you who they are, believe them."

-When you are a talkative, outgoing, fun-loving person, don’t always go for the shy, reserved, albeit very good looking guy. Yes, opposites attract but when you get older and realize you still love to talk, 20 years without a good conversation is not going to make you happy. At one point, believe it or not, you will feel that talking and connecting emotionally is more important that connecting physically. A physical connection is much easier to find and far less satisfying. It will take you many years to learn this, as well.

-Take time to walk, enjoy the birds, the trees. Everything.

-Enjoy every second of your children’s babyhood. It really does go by way too fast.

-Always be on time/never be late. Time is money and always be respectful of that. No one wants to wait for you to show up. When you are older, you will be a stickler with this, when you were young, not so much! Be more considerate sooner!

-Give the guy who’s “not your type” a second chance. There are far more important things in life than a perfect, gorgeous partner. Nice, funny and kind is far more attractive than physical beauty and lasts a lot longer. Remember that guy who brought you chicken soup every day when you were sick and you treated him like crap just because you weren't attracted to him? It will take you many years to figure this out. Figure it out sooner!

-Be more patient with the elderly. Remember that someday you will be old, as well and will appreciate kindness.

-When someone leaves another for you, it is not because you are so special, it's because that's how they roll. They will most likely leave you the same way. Once a cheater, always a cheater.  Many people will tell you this and you will not listen. Listen.

-Do not give up horseback riding; you will always love it and go back to it in your 30s and 40s.

-Do not give up the cello. It will remain your favorite instrument for years to come.

-Trust your intuition. You will brush it off for many years but it is your strength.

-Do not give up your spiritual path once you get busy with life. You started on this path in your early 20s…keep on it, as you will just get back to it later in life and you will waste a lot of time.

-Words do matter. Be more kind and positive with your words. You have a vicious, hurtful tongue. Learn to curb that earlier!

-You know that vegetarian thing you toy with at least once a year? Stick with it. It's the way to go.

-Show gratitude every day. For all you have.

-Unfiltered is not a bad thing. Many people will tell you that it is and try to shut you up, but your honesty and candor is what draws people to you. Remember that you are OPEN; unfiltered is someone else's description of you and it is inaccurate.

Having written this, I’ve decided that I want to live the next 20 years based on what my 65 year old self would look back and tell me. I will be very mindful of that in all I do.